Entrepreneurs are not sympathetic to rules and conventional wisdom. You could argue they are the modern version of the philosophers of yesteryear. They, on the other hand, would describe their expertise as a passion, something that is just in their blood.
Many entrepreneurs create their business with a clear-cut idea of the type of venture they wish to control but developing a product or process that serves this function requires a unique approach to the world and a mind-set honed on breaking rules and being aware the only thing guaranteed is failure. How they respond to failure determines their success.
What then the budding entrepreneur, working for a boss, confined to a desk job for nine hours a day, feeling suffocated in an office environment and desperate to become his own boss but clueless what to do when it comes to creating and growing a business. Making a bold, perhaps foolhardy, decision to leave full time employment would be the easy part.
The cavalier attitude would soon diminish with the realization that not only will a full system business kit be required, but also being unprepared for the unexpected heavy mental games your mind begins to play.
Self Sabotage isn’t a new theory but a fact that many of us humans are extremely good at. We excel at stopping ourselves from achieving our deepest desires in many different ways. We often don’t know how to handle new and unfamiliar achievements and success making us feel uneasy as we pull out of our comfort zone, affirming subconscious beliefs that we don’t deserve good things.
We have all been in situations whereby we watch friends or family members make the same annoying mistake over and over again. It’s agonisingly frustrating to watch them suffer as they reject well meaning advice time after time. If we are able to recognise self sabotage in someone else, why can’t we see the same in ourselves?
The first step is to acknowledge self sabotage before it takes control and becomes your worst enemy. Start by observing yourself. Feelings of hopelessness, low self-worth and incompetence, leading to a false state of shame and guilt. When you feel unworthy, you undermine your own good efforts. Start by taking responsibility for your life. Develop a €can do’ attitude. When you believe you can, you will. No one is pretending this is going to be easy but you have to understand negative thoughts are corrosive and will nibble away at your self-esteem.
Procrastination is probably the most typical way to self-sabotage. How? Because procrastination implicates intention and then inaction. It is the most visible sign of progress paralysis, creating an internal tug of war! This negativity is deeply rooted in old negative memories of failure, disappointment, neglect, humiliation, bullying, abuse or possibly failed nurturing that have remained stored within the subconscious mind and seize control when it anticipates you are beginning to take responsibility of your own life. It begins by injecting falling levels of self-confidence and a belief you will not be able to take care of yourself when you try facing the world and becoming an independent adult.
This paralysis begins in our thoughts and in our minds. To the unwary, those mental false experiences have a habit of feeling very real. What is even stranger is that the people who suffer most seriously from procrastination are usually not even aware of it. They believe their goals can be achieved but, not today, maybe tomorrow. This type of person will continually put things off, using this as a defence mechanism for protecting themselves from experiencing what they firmly believe will be a negative outcome.
Fear of Success
At first glance Fear of Success seems a little crazy. After all, who wouldn’t want to experience success? The Fear of Success principle is less apparent than fear of failure. Why? Because success often requires us to make great changes in our lives. If you are caught up in a loop of achieving small gains but no real progress toward your goals, the underlying cause may be fear of success. When you are just starting out, you are naturally full of energy, desire and expectation. You want to become a success as soon as possible. When that doesn’t happen your confidence gets dented and you slowly begin to develop a fear of success. You start to believe you can’t do anything right and being successful really isn’t your thing.
The fact is everyone is afraid of something. This fear of success is common and very treatable. Start to believe and understand that everything happens at the right time. Realize that as your life develops, you will be faced with challenges beyond your current fear and getting past this one hurdle will strengthen you and prepare you for the next contest.
By John Hester