What is victim mentality?
It is when you blame the outside world for that happens in your world. We have all seen it; people who drag their feet and drag their soul like it was some heavy drapery. Emotional and dramatic, you’d think they are after an Academy Award for a role in a Greek tragedy.
Yet, they seem to revel being trapped in this vicious cycle of emotional suicide and self-flagellation. (My, I need to cut back on the heavy words.) They come in, light goes out.
Victim mentality in Business
Avoid it like the plague. It is the death of the entrepreneur. If you manage to get yourself down how are you going to motivate, inspire, help others to assist you in moving toward? More importantly, how can you be of use to anyone? How can you provide value in that state?
Victim Mentality versus Leadership
Victim mentality is grounded in refusing to take responsibility for the results you’re getting. One good example of this is the person who blames his financial troubles on the government, or another person for not getting the success they so deservedly desire. Or someone who is trapped in the belief that he can not succeed in life because of his upbringing, (lack of) education, or skin color.
Leadership is just the opposite. It starts with taking responsibility and acknowledging you’re in control. Once you decide you are in control you have the ability to choose what to do with the cards life deals you. We’re all challenged and tested, don’t think you’re the only one. The sooner you start to learn how to deal with it, the better. I love the Tori Amos quote “Get off the cross, we need the wood.” She should know, listening to her music you’d think she has spent a great deal of time on it.;)
It is easy to get swallowed up in blaming others for your problems. Blaming circumstances, even. Those are not to be ignored, but to be dealt with accordingly. Life does not deal everyone the same hand. Some start the race at the start line, some start locked in the dressing room. Unfair? That is not a responsible way to think. Life is a long-distance run, not a 100 meter dash, and you can win either way.
The most important thing to do is to make a decision, and start taking responsibility for your life. You might have had to face resistance but ultimately no one other than yourself is responsible for where you are in life now. Also, people don’t give a damn whether you are successful or not, so may as well be successful.
So decide today that you will no longer be spreading the poison of victim mentality. Start taking responsibility for your life. Your new perspective will change your actions, and, in time, your results.
Having a sense of humor helps. Ever notice that “victims” have a poor sense of humor? Tell them a joke and they just look on as if nothing happened? The ability to laugh at all things can be a good start. It helps with the perspective, in any case. Also, people don’t care for your problems (they have their own), so may as well get rid of them yourself.;) Good luck.
By Nathan Dean